Brimley

Billy Mays could sell Wilford Brimley pixie sticks.

Michael Vick

Billy Mays could sell Michael Vick a pair of toothless, one legged show poodles.

This Dog

Billy Mays could sell you this dog. For only $19.95. And he could throw in a bag of shit as a bonus offer and make it sound like a bargain.

Bond

Billy Mays could sell James Bond a stirred martini.

Harvey Dent

Billy Mays could sell Two-Face proactive treatment.

Chuck Norris

Billy Mays could sell Chuck Norris a bowflex, or prostitutes, or a razor, or karate lessons, or band-aids...

Aunt Jemima

Billy Mays could sell Aunt Jemima molasses, even though she apparently doesn't **** around.

Bill Gates

Billy Mays could sell Bill Gates a mac. (without gay crossover microsoft software)

Gary Coleman

Billy Mays could sell Gary Coleman a basketball net.

Magic Johnson

Billy Mays could sell Magic Johnson the flu.

Tattoo

Billy Mays could sell me a tattoo done by Muhammed Ali.

Amy Winehouse

Billy Mays could sell Amy Winehouse braces, and get her to go to rehab.

Ray Charles

Billy Mays could sell Ray Charles 3D glasses.

Albino

Billy Mays could sell an albino a tanning bed.

Winona Ryder

Billy Mays could sell Winona Ryder something.

Vince

Billy Mays could sell Vince a SlapChop. He's gonna love his nuts. (And his cellmate's)

Ron Popeil

Billy Mays could sell Wolverine a Showtime Knife Set. Suck on that, Ron Popeil.

Stephen Hawking

Billy Mays could sell Stephen Hawking a unicycle.

Anne Frank

Billy Mays could sell Anne Frank a drum set.

Billy Mays Here!

Never before had yelling been so cool! Beards been so perfect! 

People been so inspired...

Billy Mays was the Mighty Putty to our lives, holding them together with his presence and unsurpassed gift of repetitive and irritating vocalizations.

Then, on June 28, 2009, the world shook in fear. Mighty Putty went limp and useless, OxyClean turned blood red and the Gods cried as Billy Mays met a tragic and untimely death.

People knew him by his products and his likeable and eccentric demeanor. But who was the real Billy Mays? A hero, an immortal and the greatest salesman, pitchman and MAN to walk this earth.

This blog is dedicated to remembering his legacy through his gift. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the legendary tales of Billy Mays.